Some girls asked me to post the rest of my letters here on the blog, so here you go,,
I hope you enjoy readying,,,
Dear
students,,,
Your heart ,,,,,yes
your heart,,, let’s talk about it a little.
Every week I
find it really easy to write you something,,,but this week it was really hard ,,,though
I had my fair share of deep sleep, chocolate, and plenty of peace of mind but
still I kept thinking of a topic to write for my girls ,,,ran away to the
countryside and observed nature ,,,still nothing came out. But finally, here I
am, at exactly half an hour before the mid night of Saturday talking about your
hearts to go as a Sunday letter.
Why yours
not mine? Well,, maybe because mine is worn out and yours is fresh ,,,mine has
gone half the way and yours is still at the beginning.
Maybe because
I don’t want you to go through what I had to go thorough when I was your age. Hearts
are really delicate and tough at the same time, easily broken and hard to
handle,,, surprisingly unpredictable yet very typical.
Are you
taking really good care of your hearts? Do you know when it beats fast and why?
Your heart
is the most precious instrument you will ever own, you will use it for crying, loving,
aching, capturing all the sweet moments in your life and you will use it for
praying.
You will put
your hand across it when words betray you and you are speechless and you will automatically
hold your newborn against it.
So, do you
know how to use it? Do you know how to love? When and whom? Do you know that
once you exploit it, it never functions the same? Do you know how to revive it?
And do you listen to what it says? Do you know that God looks straight into
your heart not your face? YOUR heart not any other thing. YOUR heart not the
amount of your good deeds.
Do you know
that jealousy, greed and hatred have no place in a pure heart? That too much
music slips through till there is no place for God`s words.
So next time
when you listen to your heart beats, make sure to listen carefully, make sure
to make it presentable since it’s your passport to heaven.
Make sure to
save it for the one special person in your life that you would truly call
(Galbee) let them deserve the title.
Save your heart,,,
after all ,,,,you owe your heart your whole life,,,,,
Love you all
T. Binoz
21.April.2012
Dear
students,,,
What do you
want? You don’t have to answer now just wait till you finish reading maybe I
can help you decide.
At the early formation of your characters you
will want lots of things ,,things ,,things and more things. When you just start
thinking you know how this world functions your needs change and you concentrate
on values ,,, feelings ,,,people
and stability.
I really
want to have that handy dandy pink kitchen aid mixer ,,, along with the full Wilton
cake decorating kit ,,,above all that, I will sure want a professional camera
that is worth more than 3000 JDs.
A new car
would be nice with free fuel fill ups every week,,,, and don’t even let me start
talking about a five star vacation to the most magical place on earth,,, the
Maldives .
Then again
when I come to think of what I really want I would choose good health ,, wisdom ,, peace of mind ,,, success and to
be surrounded by my loved ones all the time.
So what do
you really want? Don’t answer now,,,
If you
happen to be normal, then I won’t be surprised if you asked for things, I won’t
be surprised if you wanted the impossible to happen in no time ,,,if you wanted
to change people and move mountains.
I won’t be
surprised if you didn’t know what you wanted, it’s not your fault ,,I know a lot of people who still don’t know ! Don’t
feel guilty!
Life goes on
and your needs change as you grow up,,, you believe you want something really
bad but then again it’s not that important
,,,,,but there is this one thing you would still want no matter life
changes you and how old you become ,, ,there has to be this one thing that you
want ….whether a teen or an adult ,,,a young lady or a mature mom,, ,it doesn’t
change.
What do your
parents want from you? What do your friends want from you? What obligation
burdens you at school from the massive amount of (I want) that teachers demand?
What do YOU
want? Don’t answer now,,,,,
What does
God want from you? You think you know? ,,,I used to think I knew,,
I always
thought that God wanted me to pray a lot,,, be good and never gossip! And
forgive the taxi driver whom splashed me with filthy water the other day,,,(I’m
working on all the mentioned ,,,but still can’t forgive the dude who ruined my
day with stains of "Majaree" water all over my new jilbab,,,I have to be a saint
to forgive him,,, unfortunately I’m not !! ) Of course those are things on a
long list of living well and worshiping Him perfectly,,,, but what does God
really want from me, you, us and every human being He created?
God,,,,
what do You want?
The answer
came to me as simple as the question ,,, it was not in a form of worship ,, demand
or dos and don’ts…..
( يريد الله ليبين
لكم ويهديكم سنن اللذين من قبلكم ويتوب عليكم والله عليمٌ حكيم(26)
والله يريد ان يتوب عليكم ويريد اللذين يتبعون الشهوات أن تميلوا ميلاً
عظيماَ(27) يريد الله ان يخفف عنكم وخلق الانسان ضعيفاً(28) ) النساء
So now you
tell me ,,,,, what do you want?
With all my love,,,,,
T. Binoz
28. April.2013
Dear
students,
I have this
notebook that contains dates of my children's firsts,,,,
Sultan`s
first day of school, Sultan and Maryam`s first Eid prayer at the mosque, first
rides on bikes, first tooth to grant to the fairy, first show and tell ,first
home work, first trip on a plane,,, and the list goes on and on.
When I come
to think of it I always romanticize the idea of their weddings,,, I mean the
wedding data show should be a hit and the pics should go with dates that people
would gasp and say: "ya salam!! How amazing this mom is, she kept a record!"
Don't you think? :p
It got me
hocked up so well that I'm afraid it turned into an obsession, it's the desire
to seize every memory I have with them let alone wanting to capture laughter
and happiness through camera lenses, imagining how great of a pause that would
be if only I had the camera with me,,,,
(I have a future
in photography I promise :p my dad is a professional photographer that forgot
to hand down the right genes to his daughters,, that's why I forget the camera)
Then I came
to realize that while I was preoccupied in the frenzy of catching memories, I'm
losing the real moment, forgetting to live the day by its highs and lows ,,
I realized
that not pausing for the perfect picture and not writing any dates on a
notebook might be the best way to create a memory because the most precious ones
are those of ordinary days that went by without perks or milestones or even
great pauses that tempt even a lousy photographer like myself.
live your
firsts!
live them
fully as to remember them not to memorize them,, live your firsts through your
feelings and emotions with all the
people that were there to share with you,,,, live your firsts as tomorrow might
never come,,, live your firsts through your eyes not your camera lenses,,, make
the best out of them ,,,
For I'm afraid
a day might come when you live in a world that requires a notebook like mine
coupled with crap memory also like mine to register memories and firsts of you
and your loved ones.
I love you all
and yes I'm back
T. Binoz
Sunday
8th ,Sep,2013
Dear students,
Liana is one
of the few people I will never forget in my life. She taught me the most
precious lesson any one could ever teach me: "Not to judge!" I'm still learning
though.
I have never
in my life seen a person so intimidating like Liana. She was easily recognized
in the university as the "black girl", not referring to her complexion
but to her wardrobe! she always ALWAYS wore black.
Black skirts
with black tops with black bags with black accessories along with her black
hair, she was more like a wandering raven I thought back then.
She had her
nose pierced and held her hair in a bun most of the time, you couldn't help but
notice her whenever she passed by and the credit was for the dull yet bold
color she deliberately wore every single day.
At the back
of my mind I wondered what sort of life this girl has and what had gotten her
into screaming out her personality in such a way !! I also included her in my prayers thinking subconsciously
that I was in a better place, I prayed, fasted, read Quran so of course I'm a "good
girl" compared to this Gothic figure that reminded me of singers in heavy
metal bands . She needed all the help I could offer, I thought, even if it was in the form of a silent
prayer.
One day, at
the end of a late writing class we shared together, I offered Liana a ride home,
I didn't think she would agree but to my amazement she did!
In the car
it really felt awkward because I didn't know what sort of a conversation we
would both have, but she turned out to be a normal person just like anyone else.
Actually, she was sweeter than most of my colleagues.
I could hear Maghreb prayer calling as a background
rhythm and she started looking for something in her bag.Just before we reached
her home Liana took out praying clothes out of her bag and sighed in relief
that she didn't forget them in the uni.
And for the
first time in two years I saw the reflection of another color on Liana, the
white praying clothes made a controversy with the black she used to wear.
White was more like a truce actually
compensating all the mourning she did
since I have known her .Liana taught me without uttering a single word that I
was far away from being a "good
girl" !
Don't we all
tend to judge others? It's like a default system in our heads, we scan people
in less than a minute and give judgments based on what we see from the outside.
I didn't
give Liana a chance, she did,,,, she didn't judge me !
let's give
people a chance, no one is perfect and who told you that angles are always
white? They might as well be black !
love you all
T. Binoz
Sunday
22,Sep,2013
