Sunday, September 7, 2014

Dear Tawjihi,,

Dear Tawjihi,
This one is for you,,
It's more than just a word that defines the misery of a seventeen year old trying to figure out what life is all about and how difficult it is to make decisions that will change the course of your future FOREVER!
It's more than a word your mom throws at you like the Veto card whenever you claim your God- given right to have fun ,use your mobile, watch Turkish soap operas, breath, eat, sleep, laugh, feed the hamster, wash your dads car that you never washed before but now you suddenly have a strong desire to do so just to escape the encounter with that hideous book of "Thaqafeh 3ameh ".
It's more than the countless tasteless press conferences you will unwillingly watch on national T.V " which by the way you never watched before" just to see what his Excellency, the one and only, the all-star, the man of the show,, Mr.Thnebat might say about the results.
It's more than the nightmare you all feared but turned out to be a reality now,,
Tawjihi is more than just a phase,,
It's the 180 days you will spend with people like you who have same dreams of success and happiness,,
It's the time of your life when you know true friends and fake ones, you know who was there for you and who just didn't bother at all,,
It's the zillion selfies you will take with those closest to your heart,,,
It's you teaching your mom ( unintentionally) how to pray for you,,,how to ask God viciously and whole heartedly in the depths of cold nights to grant her precious baby a happiness that would fill her heart with grace,,,
It's your dad at your graduation holding his tears back,, his heart racing and in the back of his mind it's the image of you in his hands when you were first born,,
It's,, your pillow baring witness of all your tears that you shed silently in moments of despair,, when you thought you were all alone in this and never knew that people who love you are sparing moments of their days to keep you in their prayers.
It's you running out of options and knowing that the only way out of this is to go deep, to live the moment by its highs and lows,,
It's when you finally know that you have grown into a whole new person, ,just one year and it teaches you so much all at once,,
That no matter what happens, you are worth more than the score you get,,
You make "Tawjihi" because simply,,,,"Tawjihi" does not make you.
You are all in my prayers
love you,
T.Binoz
7,Sep,2014


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